Thingamagiggy…

Something I’ve always struggled with is putting words to exactly how I’m feeling. It’s hard to explain something that only I can feel, and try and get my point across to others. It’s frustrating, but I try my best! I have a feeling in my foot/leg right now, thats sort of numb, but not completely numb to the touch.. Sort of tingly.. sort of dull.. Almost like when your foot falls asleep. I think that’s the best I can do at explaining it. I don’t know if maybe it’s a mild relapse, but the longer it sticks around the more I’m starting to think it is. It’s not the worst thing in the world, and I think I would turn down steroids for it since they make me feel so horrible, but it sucks and I hope it goes away! I have a similar feeling in my right hand that I’ve gotten used to, so if it doesn’t go away I suppose I’ll adapt and learn to ignore that to and just learn to live with it. I think that’s about all we can do sometimes and I’ve accepted that.

Lately I just haven’t been feeling good. Something I again have a hard time putting into words. How do you feel? Well… not good! I’m always exhausted, light headed, can’t concentrate, and feel off balance… but there’s also this just general feeling of… crap! I wish a doctor would just accept that explanation and somehow knew what I meant. I don’t feel well and there’s no other way to explain it. Deal with it, doc!

I finally (begrudgingly) contacted the MS clinic that I go to to give them a heads up and am waiting to hear back. I hate contacting them. I feel like they already don’t like me or take me seriously, and if I ever do reach out it feels like I’m just annoying and over reacting. Someone reminded me recently that it’s best to contact them when things come up so they’ll have it on my file, so I gave in and called and am waiting to hear back if the doctor has any opinion on the matter.

In the mean time I’m working on figuring out the best way to describe these feelings. Someone needs to come up with a symptom thesaurus!

M

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